The time inside us..around us and above us..

It was a long time since i wrote a blogpost..especially in English.
Things are happening all the time, every day and every minute. Big things and small things. My life is
no exception.

I have wrote many times in many places that this was going to be our last winter here. That was my hope and my plan. But things change. To move is not an easy thing. But it’s still something i dream about.

I have so many things im longing for in my hometown..not only to meet and help my parents who is 83 and 86 years old..but also to be close to my children and friends. My parents needs my help and it feels like im loosing much of their lifes as they grow older. My thoughts are about what’s really important in my life. All my life i have thought about what’s most important and what’s comes second and third. I have made many really bad choices in my life and i just have to live with that. But i can do my best from now on. I can do that. And i pray for strength to do that every day because for me it’s complicated..i will tell you some day..maybe.

I often write that im full of hope and joy and that’s true. I think anything is possible and that anything can happen..at any time.

Life is a gift and the world is only as big as your mind is..

My life..are both very simple and extremely complicated..on one hand i have most that i need to survive..on the other hand i need help with many things.

Every journey and every struggle and every sorts of pain and anxiety are individual and you can’t compare pain. This is very important in these day when there is so much going on in the world with refugees..war..unemployment and illness. Many people feel guilt if they speak about their own pain and their own anxiety.
But the most important is your own experience of things..and different people can cope with difficult things in different ways..
Your pain and your anxiety is important and to keep it inside your self doesn’t help you, and it doesn’t help anyone else either.
Let it all out..only when you do that you can help other people..and there are many people in need of help..

I know what i can and what i can’t do..i have an ocean of tears inside of me..and i can see things inside me that no one else can see..i have to work with that to be able to help other people in need in a good way.
But at the moment i don’t know how..i don’t know what door i can open and what would happen if i do..

My life right now..it could change tomorrow..



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